Hark the bells, the 90’s soda revival continues unabated. Well, maybe.
Like other 90’s sodas, Crystal Pepsi—a clear version of Pepsi, basically, for those who were unfamiliar with it back in its heydey—has an extremely (and somewhat inexplicably) devoted following. Based on what PepsiCo told Kevin Strahle, a professional competitive eater* and devoted member of the Cult of the Once and Future Pepsi recently, though, it looks like Crystal Pepsi fans might not be waiting too long to satisfy their fix:
Granted, this doesn’t guarantee Crystal Pepsi is coming back. Given the context, however, it’s hard to figure out what else “we think you’ll all be happy with what’s in store” could mean.
I’ve never understood the appeal of Crystal Pepsi, which just seemed like regular Pepsi (the shittiest of all non-aspartame-laden sodas) minus caffeine but plus fancy marketing. Then again, my reaction to Clearly Canadian’s impending return was to start visibly vibrating and making a high-pitched keening noise, so maybe I’m not one to talk. But I think with the return of everything beloved by children of the 90’s—Clearly Canadian, Surge, now (potentially) Crystal Pepsi—it’s time to ask the real question: when are Dunkaroos coming back? Because I will straight fuck up some Dunkaroos.
* I do not possess the words to express how much I hate that this is a thing.
Contact the author at WilyUbertrout@gmail.com.